I can't sleep. Sometimes I just don't
feel like going to sleep until I can't stay awake any longer. So it's 5.29 am of a Monday. I'm working today... and I'm listening to a
beautiful song repeatedly, I just heard it in a movie. I think my
life has changed so much in the last few days, I feel a deep sense of
humility I've never felt before... but real humility: a deep sense of
respect and appreciation for my life. Much of what we say we believe
and live for stays in words, in a narrative that we tell to
ourselves, but we don't feel it deeply. I wish people would value and
strive to be kinder, much kinder, without expecting kindness in
return. I wish people were more compassionate. I wish people would
strive to understand the other one, just a little bit better. Things
could be so simple, life could be so simple for all of us: I try to
be simple in everything I do and say, I like people to understand
what I mean, I try to think in a simple way, in a straight forward
manner. 5.49 am and I'm secretly happy, what's the point to live if
we don't do what we really want to do. The problem is of course that
most of the time either we don't know what to do or we can not afford
the luxury of even thinking about the things we want to do. And I
seriously wonder, whether I live the life I want to live... but life
is a journey, there will be happiness and there will be sorrow, there
will be playfulness and there will be pain, there will be success and
there will be failure, we will be afraid and we will feel confident.
In one hundred years every single person I know including myself will
not exist any more. How many people have you ever inspired? How many
people have you fearlessly loved? I want to give myself one hundred
percent, do you? I have to answer two important emails today, and I
wish I could write some more; but since I haven't slept I'll probably
feel my head foggy until I get my good eight hours of sleep. Do you
feel that your life is awesome? Do you understand that at the end
whether your life is awesome or not, it all depends on the
perspective you have of your own life? This is it, it is now, it is
right now, at this very moment. It is at this very moment when you
know that your life is awesome. I've met people so amazing, I've met
people so smart, I've met people so beautiful, and they don't even
know it. And it is very important to acknowledge yourself,
acknowledge your existence as something positive, or magnificent, or
miraculous. Would you offer one day or your life to alleviate the pain of
someone who needs it? Would you exchange life for a day with a
starving child? We all have to live through tough moments, some of us
have endured more hardships than others. But pain, sorrow, and misery
come in many shapes... starvation or loneliness, what's more painful?
I'm so grateful, I'm truly am. Would I be still happy even if
everything I have would be taken away from me? Would you be happy? We
are so dishonest to ourselves. I believe the secret to happiness
resides in patience, kindness, generosity, empathy. Impatience leads
to precipitated and impulsive decisions, in other words bad
decisions. Kindness means that you respect life, that you respect
others, that you respect yourself. Generosity is giving everything
you are. Empathy is the opposite of being judgemental, it is seeing
deeper on a person's heart, it is understanding beyond the words
said. 6.30 am and I should stop here... I don't really know what I
should do now, should I sleep? Should I stay awake?
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